I’ve seen a lot of relationships go sour after friends began to live together. Mostly, I’d say it all boils down to communication. It’s important to know what the other person/people are thinking in order to figure out what to do when there’s a conflict.
1. Talk about your differences
If you know the way your roommate operates, it’s more likely you’ll be able to understand why they do the things they do. By figuring out who likes to do what around the house will enable you to split up chores/cleaning so everyone is contributing equally. I tend to be a really clean person so my roommate and I have an agreement that I’ll do most of the sweeping/mopping/kitchen stuff and she always takes out the garbage/recycling. When I have some extra thing to clean I ask her to do it and she complies. It makes sense because I prefer things cleaner, whereas she doesn’t really mind. I’m not going to get mad at her for not being as neat as me because I know it doesn’t bother her. I’d rather just take care of it myself and not have to hassle her.
2. Do nice things for them!
Make them a cup of tea or coffee, offer to bring them a snack, occasionally do dishes that aren’t yours. It’s a give and take relationship, and you’re not going to get any if you don’t give any. There are times when I’ll finish the dishes in the sink because there’s only a few. My roommate will reciprocate by doing that for be sometimes, too! It’s so nice to walk into the kitchen thinking you have dishes to do only to realize that your roommate took care of it for you.
3. Replace the communal things
Communicate about what you’re running low on so that you buy everything equally. Things like toilet paper, paper towels, soap, sponges, cleaning supplies, ect. There’s nothing worse than needing hand soap and not having any.
4. Always be upfront
If something is bothering you, they’ll probably notice. It’s always better to speak openly and honestly about any concerns you may have. Letting things stew will only make you feel worse, and when you finally do decide to talk about it you may not be as level-headed as you were when you first started thinking about it. Bringing up any issues quickly will ensure minimal passive aggressiveness and will maintain a healthy dialogue.